just be.

more listsurdity

tonight's installment of "as the list turns" brings you two gems. the first one was flagged and removed, but my rss feed still picked it up:

Who's the flag police with all the opinions? Show up or shut up!! (Nowhere) Why don't you leave a contact number or email something you chicken shit. All these opinions and no guts. If you don't like reading a few posts, don't read them. I know you will flag this like you always do, but you are a moron, so I guess I understand. I know everything is junk to you except Japanese stuff, so move there. I know you don't shop at Target, Wal Mart or anything like that too. You are great. God bless you!!!! I would love nothing more than to have a dealer section for cycles and atv's, but they don't have that option. Find in the CL rules where it says I can't post. I know you won't have the guts to email me personally, because you are a moron. Sorry, I already said that.

um, what does "japanese stuff," target, or wal-mart have to do with anything?

the second is just...well, i'm not sure how to introduce this one:

alot of different stuff whatcha want and whatcha got? (i'm in west mifflin)

Reply to: [email protected]
Date: 2008-04-15, 1:36PM EDT

i have what you see here and much more let me know what your looking for and i'll let you know if i got it! email or call with questions pick-ups and any other info! i'm missy and you can reach me at 412-462-5460 all day!

Location: i'm in west mifflin
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 643361066

okay. now, when i saw this in the rss feed, i thought that it must be a cruel prank on poor missy--the 21st-century version of putting "for a good time, call xxx-xxx-xxxx" on a bathroom wall. i couldn't believe that anyone would actually post this. but i clicked through to see whether there were any photos (my rss feed is weird: some photos show up and others show just text). there were photos of the following four items:

1. a "close encounters of the third kind" lunch box
2. a cabbage-patch kids lunch box
3. a contraption that i believe to be a rabbit hutch
4. four gold things that i simply cannot identify. want to take a stab at it?

i'm going with either some kind of bizarre golf accoutrement or the sad, amputated feet from a ridiculously ornate chair. what do you think?

riddle me this, batman-san.

okay. am i being a terrible western snob to think that this sounds absolutely ridiculous?

good.god.

i'm more addicted to television than anyone my age i know. but even i think this is ridiculous. seriously. if i'm outside, i'm outside. unhook the iv. i can wait until later to watch my stories.

i is for impromptu

what an unexpected haul. will have to post photos later (edited: now, with photos!), when i actually have the energy to take some--right now, i'm completedly exhausted. today was our neighborhood's community yard sale, with hundreds of homes getting rid of as much stuff as they could. smartboy spent about $100, bringing home

• a fabulous 1950s sideboard (that will temporarily hold up our television, meaning i get to strip the 1950s coffee table currently holding it and use it for a coffee table, finally, and get rid of our awful brass-oak-and-glass 1980s coffee table--hooray!) we scored for $15
• an equally fabulous 1940s wardrobe that will go either in the kitchen or the bedroom--a really amazing piece for which we paid $50
• a shop vac
• a wooden glider bench for our back yard for $10
• two blackout drapes for $10

i was equally happy with my $74 worth of purchases:

• a black crepe sheath dress with matching long jacket for $1 (really i bought them to wear separately more than together, i think)
• a maroon fine-gauge scoop-neck sweater for $3
• two skirts (one silk--NOT pvc or pleather, like i know it looks in my photo--in coral and muted pale neutrals that may work for the september wedding and the other in a lightweight black knit ), two blouses (both ann taylor in blue , one silk), and a dress (blue-and-white striped sheath) for $25. (hm. it occurs to me that i thought i'd also gotten a pair or two of pants in there. were they not in there when i paid for them? or did i just not notice them when i put everything away? apparently, i left them behind. stupid, because one of the pairs of pants was really nice and i wanted them. ugh.)
• black fine-gauge ballet-neck sweater for $1
• a fondue set for $2.50 (currently in the dishwasher, missing a couple of pieces, but hey--$2.50??)
• a pincushion with little spools of thread in different colors (good for finishing knitting projects that require buttons and ribbon, something i've needed more and more lately) for $2
• a vintage tupperware lettuce keeper (just like my mother used to have) and a vintage metal weaving loom (just like the one i used to have and just like the one martha featured in her magazine recently) for $2.50 i mean, how adorable is that box??
• a bag stuffed full of yarn and a huge handful of aluminum needles and a few crochet hooks for $20 (i didn't photograph the yarn--it's just regular old skeins of craft-store yarn, nothing fancy--or the circulars or crochet hooks, but here are the tops of the straight needles, or at least all the ones that had mates)
• a wine box (*almost* exactly the right size for storing knitting needles--i wish it were about 1/4-1/2" taller) for $2

the knitting needles included three little double-pointed needles. yes, three. i'd hoped to uncover the fourth when i got them all home, but no luck. they're not even the same size. so i now have a pair of size sixes, one size five, a full set of size fives i'd owned before, and a full set of 2.5s i'd owned before. (so, sp, to answer your question, i don't really know what size i'd want for knitting socks--i don't have a pattern or even really any yarn yet. from what i can tell, it depends, right? guess i'm not very helpful, huh? sorry :( )

but it was a fun day. i scored many great clothes and we have some great new vintage furniture coming. (have to go back to pick up the sideboard and wardrobe tomorrow--we were walking today.) plus we stopped for brunch at our favorite neighborhood restaurant in the middle of all of it. yum--nutella crepes with strawberries and a strawberry-apple smoothie with protein powder. deelish.

glam steelers gear

i know, two in quick succession like this isn't seemly, but these just came to my attention (thanks, Shanna!), and they're just too good not to share: kathrine baumann's $300 double mirror and $2700 helmet bag, both available from the nfl shop. my most urgent question: does the compact fit inside the purse ? because otherwise, these are just completely impractical.

do ducks need rain gear?

inspired by and in honor of my favorite blog, i cannot resist posting this. truly, yard art at its finest. the loving owners bestow these Plow and Heart Rain Ducks not only with little snap-under-the-chin bonnets for their heads and way oversized booties for their webbed feet, but also with ponchos to protect their backs...from...water.